Meanderings.

When the Packers are in the superbowl ... we stay home. Granted this has not happened much over the years. But this year ... we exchanged party invitations for our couch. My sister, her husband and my mom came over ... Kyle said that was borderline too many people. I think he was just as nervous for the game as the players likely were.



Thank goodness the Packers won.



Because I'm not sure my husband's heart could have taken a loss.



And I'm pretty sure he cried when they won. Ain't that sweet?

Among many other healthy treats ... we indulged in some of my famous taco dip during the superbowl. My recipe is really basic ... but for some reason it is a hit everywhere I take it. My friends are often asking me for the recipe ... clearly none of them ever write it down. Leading into the superbowl, Linda asked me to make the recipe a tab on my blog ... freakin hilarious.

1. Get yourself some cream cheese, sour cream and Taco Bell taco seasoning. Yes ... it has to be this brand ... the others have funky stuff in them. Ha.



2. Mix one heaping spoonful of sour cream, one of cream cheese, half a packet of taco seasoning and a splash of milk. Whip it up and spread it on your platter. If you need more ... then just mix more. Genius, right?



3. Finely brown a pound of hamburger. Layer it on ... followed by a layer of lettuce and cheese. Add tomatoes if you must. Just know that is not part of my recipe. Because I cannot stand tomatoes.



4. Get yourself some tortilla chips and indulge. Easy peasy.

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Yesterday started out as kind of a bum day for me. I think the hardest part of infertility treatment is the two week wait. I mean ... it is likely difficult for anyone that is trying to conceive, but there is something so final about big red coming when you are doing infertility treatments. You don't just get to try again next month.

Ahh ... it got the best of me yesterday morning. 

I really was not feeling confident in success. But one little miss by the name of Chicky did her part to cheer me up. She had an ENT appointment in the afternoon ... so she missed school. After her morning preschool ... I picked her up, we went to lunch, stopped by a craft store and hit up the doctor.



The doctor part didn't go so well. Payton needed to have some recurrent wax drainage cleaned out of her ear. The nurses and I were not strong enough to hold her down ... so they papoosed her. I freakin hate that.





And she screamed. And screamed. And fought ... as much as she could. And petechiae erupted all over her face. Instantly. Poor babe.



*

We lost Payton's speech therapist today ... this is the therapist she has been seeing over the past year or so. She is a PROMPT trained therapist and she has done amazing things with Payton since we found out she she has apraxia ... she has come so far, but still has so far to go. 

While we can easily find another therapist that is PROMPT trained ... it is really hard to find a therapist that has a great rapport with your child. We had that ... and now we lost it. It sucks ... but we wish her the best in her future endeavors.

And yes, I cried.

*

Happy day peeps ... 5 days til my beta. Keeping my fingers crossed.

PS ... it pays to help adoptive families ... I won a Canon Rebel T1i ... don't hate.

The rewards are grand.

Adoption. It's been on my mind lately.

{Addison came home from Russia in November 2008 ... read more about it here}

I'm sort of going out on a limb when I say this, but I have never been a fan of preaching adoption. There are some in this wonderful world of ours who believe that is it everyone's duty to adopt. I get that ... I get that the bible says that is what we should do.

{Sofia came home from Ukraine in June 2010 ... read more about it here}

Religion that our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this; to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. ~James 1:27

{Alina came home from Ukraine in April 2010 ... read more about it here}

And I'm really going out on a limb when I say this, but I also do not believe that everyone has what it takes to adopt. Yet, I do believe that everyone has what it takes to help protect an orphan.

{Evangeline came home from Ukraine in August 2009 ... read more about it here}

He blesses those who provide for the orphan. ~Deuteronomy 14:29

{Jacob came home from Ukraine in June 2009 ... read more about it here}

Adopting a child is a very exciting thing ... saving innocence from danger. Adopting a child is also a very rewarding thing ... but it is really hard too. Really hard. Once the excitement of the adoption wears off, you have a child on your hands. A child that you do not know ... and a child that does not know you.

{John David came home from Ukraine in November 2010 ... read more about it here}

My friend Leah said it well, as she waited to bring her son home ...

We don't expect that Axel is going to get off that plane, walk into our home and be a smiley, giggly boy who can hardly wait to get on with life. 

When parenting [step children], you do not love them right away, and they do not love you. Sometimes it takes years before you feel honest "love" toward them. You care about them! And you nurture them! But that is very different than a mother/child love bond, or a father/child love bond. It just really depends upon the chemistry between you and the child. Sometimes it is there, and sometimes it is not. I think that people are surprised when they bring a child into their home and that bond is not automatic, or in their eyes takes way too long to develop. Sometimes you love the child long before the child loves you in return. Sometimes it is the other way around.

Part of the reason this bond is different is because an older child comes with other people's habits. You didn't get to develop these habits, and they can be very annoying to you as a parent. It can be very difficult to not blame the child for these habits that they had established since they were small and suddenly you want them to change and do things your way.

{Reese came home from Ukraine in March 2009 ... read more about it here}

Very wise words ... if I do say so myself. Eventually the hurdles fade into the past ... and a time comes that life isn't so much about bonding and attachment ... but simply living life. The rewards are grand and they only get so much sweeter.

These babies? They are waiting to come home. They are waiting to make life grand for their new family ... how can you help?

:: Dickinson family, adopting Masha ... iPad raffle ends 2.25.11

:: Smith family, adopting Yana ... donate here ... Giveaway ends 2.28.11

:: Cox family, adopting Kareen ... donate here ... iPad raffle ends 2.5.11

:: Patti, raising money for three orphans ... Pure Love giveaway ends 2.11.11

:: Senti family, adopting Ember ... donate here ... Gucci watch raffle ends 2.12.11

:: Valentine's Day fundraiser for Veronika ends 2.19.11

:: Filmore family, adopting Anya ... donate here {court date: 2.22.11}

:: Davis family, adopting Kirill ... donate here {court date: 3.17.11}

:: Higbie family, adopting Lera and ... donate here

:: Sader family, adopting Melanie ... donate here

:: Dirkes family, adopting Charlotte ... donate here

:: Maddex family, adopting Danil ... donate here

Adoptive families ... I know there are so many of you out there. If you would like to be included in this post, please email me at bethanybalsis@mac.com with your info.

PS ... isn't it funny that never once in this post did I mention Down syndrome? That was not intentional ... it just isn't relevant. Well, it is relevant in that the future of babes with Down syndrome in other countries is horrid. That is why we need to get them home. 

PPS ... and yeah, all of the beautiful babes in this post have Down syndrome. Oh, you already knew that? Ha.

Update: Adding in other great adoption fundraisers ... outside of the Down syndrome community ... 

:: Johnson family, adopting Kasidi ... Canon Rebel T1i raffle ends 2.7.11

:: Lori and family ... adopting Elijah and Isaiah ... gift card raffle ends 2.20.11

:: Hurley family ... adopting AJ and Jenna Elizabeth ... iPad raffle ends 3.5.11

Dr. Suess

On New Year's Eve ... we took the kids to see Ice! at the Gaylord Hotel, featuring How the Grinch Stole Christmas by Dr. Suess. Yeah ... I am a little behind on blogging ... perhaps Christmas photos are next.

Ice! is a custom ice exhibit that is made by artisans flown in from all over the world. It is freakin amazing ... and takes a whole lot of talent, that I would love to have.

The exhibit is kept at 9 degrees ... um yeah, it is cold. They give you these huge blue eskimo coats to wear over your own coat ... Nika waddled like a penguin and could barely walk.

The ice slides ... all three kids went down ... brr!

Outside the exhibit they have these carolers ... err, performers ... to set the holiday mood. Love that.

And this enormous Christmas tree made out of Peeps ... how cool is that?

We meandered over into the Gaylord ... that is one awesome hotel. This glass Christmas tree hung from the ceiling.

And right under the tree was a train for the kids ... big and little ... to ride. I snapped pictures ... "Guys, look at me!"

Oop ... not good enough for this perfectionist momma. Try again. By this time, I had snapped maybe 20 shots and still didn't get them all looking.

Do you think Mason was frustrated with me? Ha ... just look and smile, kid.

"Thank you all for at least looking in my direction!"

We really had a great day. I love taking time to do things like this with just our little family.

My butt is numb.

Sitting here in my bed. Yesterday was pampered by my husband and today ... my mom and grandmother. I don't know how people do this for extended periods of time. I mean ... my butt is numb. And although I had all these grand aspirations of getting a ton of things done on my laptop ... I'm not sure any of that has happened.

My grandmother saw the picture of our little ice baby yesterday and proclaimed, "I am 80 years old and I learn something new every day!" Well ... she will be 80 years, on Valentine's Day. And of course she was horrified that people know we are trying to have a baby ... "Isn't anything private these days?!"

Ha ... love her.

*

I snuck up on my girls a few days ago.



Oops ... caught red handed.



"That is quite the assortment you got there, Payton."

"Yeah."

She agreed.




Beautiful my babies. Beautiful.



*

Mason came home from school yesterday and told me he broke up with his girlfriend. When I asked him why, he told me that he didn't know ... he just felt like it. Oh ... and the best part is he told her sister to tell her. Clearly I have a lot of teaching to do here.

Wait ... why does my 7 year old have a girlfriend?

*

A couple days ago, I posted this on facebook and twitter ... Last night at 11:51pm, I came upstairs to find Payton still awake and laying in bed playing on her brother's iPod Touch. Little stinker! So I took it away and told her to go to sleep. Two minutes later, I hear the tv ... I go in and the little stinker had turned a movie on!! Inside I was cracking up, but I sternly told her to.go.to.sleep! All I could think of was ain't no Down syndrome gonna stop this chick ... SHE IS SMART AS A WHIP!!

::love her::

She has been pulling this kind of stuff a lot lately. The best of them have to do with her iPod Touch and hiding it behind her back real quick when I come into her room at night to check on her. The little stinker knows she shouldn't be goofing around on it ... devious little thang. And as much as I know I have to discipline her to her face ... I just can't help but smile. Never in my life did I think my child with Down syndrome would have the smarts and the wit to pull stuff like this ... I'll take more please!

*

Payton just brought me this picture.



I asked her if she colored it for me and she said, "No ... birfday!" Guess it is her birthday today ... news to me, but whatever makes you happy, baby.

*

Oh ... and the winners of the BusyBodyBook are ...



The Lehnick Family said... Ok...so if I don't win one of these...where do you get it???? I can't get enough of your sweet family...You are perfect in every way... (#10)

RK said... Isn't it funny how commenters come out of the woodwork for free stuff!?! But who can blame us? That looks like a pretty nifty little item, I admit. I told someone recently that since leaving the professional world, I didn't really use my PDA or smartphone for my life-brain like I used to. And I haven't found a replacement... dangerous. (#36)

Anonymous said... Bethany, I'm always on the look out for a great calendar that can handle a family of five-this looks like it might be it! I love a good calendar! Hope you're enjoying your snow days! Mindy Ripp (#27)

stephanie said... Love the new name, and your giveaway. Right now I use a calendar that is missing most of the time. if I don't write everything down I'm seriously in trouble. and I never carry the calendar with me so I am dependent on my steel trap of a mind to remember things until I get home. I always thought I was an organized person , but the truth be known I'm a mess! (#16)


Ladies ... shoot me an email at bethanybalsis@mac.com with your address and I will get these out to you. Hopefully tomorrow ... after bed rest is over.

And if you wanted to order your own BusyBodyBook ... click here ... it looks like the 2011 calendar year is 15% off.

By the way ... that giveaway was fun ... maybe we should do it more often!

Stick stick stick!

Sometimes ... when you are on 24-hour bed rest ... feeling anxious ... you might think that reading some inspirational quotes might help your mood. And sometimes ... instead of landing on a quote that spews wine and roses ... you find just what you need to make you laugh.

Millions of couples suffer from infertility, so why the *bleepity bleep* is everyone pregnant but me?

Ah, much better.

No really ... other people being pregnant does not bother me. At one time, it did. But right now ... I am super excited for all the people in my life that are pregnant ... my sister, my sister-in-law, two of my cousins, one of my best friends, a good neighbor friend, a long time friend.

Seriously, can I get some of that water ya'll are drinking?

Oh right ... on to today.

This morning my stomach was in knots. I took a whole lot of deep breaths to try to release some of my anxiety, but I am not sure how much it worked. I was so nervous that neither blast would survive the thaw. That would put us back at square one with no feet to walk on.

On our way to the doctor, my nurse called me with some information I had requested ...

Your blasts were frozen on day 6 and both were Grade 1 ... which is the best you can get. I really don't think you will have any problems with them surviving the thaw ... these are great blasts.

*tears*

I told Kyle that the two blasts we had transferred back in 2005 were rated equal or above to these two frozen blasts and one of them was rated below the blasts that were frozen. The problem was that the two that ended up being frozen were developing a little more slowly and they were not ready for my day 5 transfer.

Did I lose ya yet?

Anyway, Kyle said, "Well at least we know they are fighters! They are Payton's fraternal triplets and we know she is a bull headed little thing ... so these guys must be too."

Love him.

Unfortunately ... when we got to the doctor, we were told that only one of our blasts survived the thaw. I tried to hold it together, all the while knowing how our odds had just been slashed in half.

The surviving blast was rated at 80% ... and 80% and above is what they hope for. The second blast was only rated at 40-50% ... they discouraged us from transferring that blast, in light of the poor quality.

We agreed.



So we have one little blast ... stick stick stick!!

And seriously ... thank you so, so much to everyone for all of your thoughts and prayers. I have been moved to tears more than once ... and I swear I do not regret my decision to open up about this.

Infertility sucks!!